This past weekend we held our first electronics sabbath. We've been meaning to for a while now but kept getting distracted from doing it (and if that isn't irony I'm not sure what is). Yesterday I talked about the decline of many things in light of social media and smart phones. You might want to read my thoughts there to give you better insight into what I'm saying here.
We instituted a no electronics sabbath from sundown to sundown. A 24 hour period in which we literally shut down and/or powered off our phones and computers. We did still allow the Wii and limited TV (as in 1 movie). We gave our redheads a few hours warning so they could frantically text their friends to tell them about the cruel and unusual punishment we were dealing. :) I let it be known in Facebook land that I wouldn't be around (not like I was missed or anything) and at sundown we powered off and let our electronics get a little rest themselves. We got milkshakes to "soothe" ourselves and the oldest tried a facial mask. The first little sting of no electronics hit when she wanted to take a picture of her masked face and I couldn't find my real camera. We powered on my phone for 2 minutes to snap the pic. Darn it. I really need to locate my real camera. The redheads stayed close to one another and we let them watch one movie. Us adults headed for bed.
The next day was a little different. A couple of times (okay more than a couple) I headed toward my phone to see if there were any texts I had missed. Nope. At one point I thought about replying back to someone on FB about something. Nope. All of a sudden I had all these people I needed to email. Nope. So I made a list of what I thought I needed to do once I joined the online world again. And then I allowed the day to happen. To distract the girls, specifically the oldest, from the lack of "connection" I took them shopping. That was another weird moment. I took my phone (shut off) with me just in case a car emergency came up but it stayed tucked away in my purse. Several times I thought about hopping on my phone to check this or that. Nope. On the way home, finally, I was going to call Lanny and let him know we were on the way. Nope. What did we ever do without cell phones?! Upon arriving home I discovered that the recipe I was using for dinner that night was on my Kindle. Darn it. So I powered on my Kindle for a few minutes and grabbed the recipe. Of all the nights to make something that came off my Kindle. The minute my Kindle powered up I instinctively hit the Facebook icon and it was pulled up by the time I realized what I had done and exited and went to my bookshelf for the recipe! Sheesh!
When sundown came the oldest was "jonesing" for her electronics and I realized that we need to do this more (the oldest isn't going to be too happy about that) so that the electronics in her life don't have power over her but she has power over them - and the same would be true for all of us. Taking a break from all electronics revealed to me some interesting things: I am much more dependent on my cell phone than I realized, without the "noise" of electronics the house is a lot quieter and that unnerved my kids (the hub and I were just fine with that), TV becomes a temptation when electronics aren't available (which is why I limited it to 1 movie - I didn't want a 24 hour TV marathon to replace the electronics, then there would have been no purpose to the sabbath), being without electronics made us (with the exception of Lanny) a little unsettled/ancy/irritable. In short we rely too much on our electronics to entertain us, interact for us, provide something for us (my recipe was on the Kindle!). Are there benefits to having these electronics? Yes! But we have relinquished our ability to have authenticity with others to screens and keyboards. There's no way we are giving up our electronics or social media pages but the change can come in how much we allow them to dictate our choices and behaviors and our true social lives.
We'll be doing more of these sabbaths. They are good for our souls and our relationships. The redheads may disagree with me but I think, as Monk says, they'll thank us later.
In doing some Googling for the other post I came across this site and found it to be interesting. Perhaps you would be interested by it as well.
Showing posts with label Sabbath. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sabbath. Show all posts
Friday, September 06, 2013
Thursday, September 05, 2013
We've been hijacked!
Anyone else notice the severe DECLINE in authentic relationships since the MySpace, Facebook, et al Social Media craze hit and took over our social lives? We were told it would enhance our social lives, instead I think we've been hijacked. I've been thinking about this problem for a long time. And since I started thinking about it my attention has been drawn to others who also have noticed this decline in authentic social life. Most recently I saw these two videos, ironically posted on Facebook, and it renewed my passion once again for my dislike of what "social media" has done to us. Take a watch and then we'll pick back up the conversation.
Right?! And you know as well as I do that the scenes depicted in that first video aren't exaggerated. I am pretty sure the majority of us have done one, or more, of those things. I know I have. Much to my shame and compulsion.
Authentic social life has been hijacked for the sake of technology and advancements. It makes me sad. Yes, I participate in it - probably too much - and even as I do I hate it. I hate that my connections have diminished to the point of a thumbs up and that I can fake a good mood and nobody is the wiser. I hate that I can be a totally different person through social media and people like me for a false representation of who I am. (Btw, I am probably 99% authentic on my social media sites, my theory is if I can't be the same person on social media as I am in person then I need to reevaluate myself. Ask people who have known me long before social media made an appearance - heck before computers were even around! - and I hope they would say that I am the same on social media as in person.) I hate that smart phones have actually dumbed us down - we no longer have to think for ourselves and try to find answers out on our own, that's what Google is for. I hate that kids these days don't know how to spell properly, they don't know how to write in full sentences, they don't use etiquette while on the phone, they can barely hand write anything, any teacher right now could add to this particular list I've got going on. I hate that people have become uncomfortable with silence and with themselves, that they feel they need to distract themselves all of the time lest they are forced to be introspective or engage with others. I hate that eye contact has become extinct and people are more comfortable looking at their screens than in the eyes of someone. I hate that people have used social media as their newest platform to be rude, passive aggressive, pompous. I hate that people somehow think it is okay to tear other people's beliefs, ideas, and thoughts to shreds and use social media as their excuse for poor behavior. There's more that I dislike but I think you get the idea.
I know. The lady doth protest too much while posting this newest blog on her social media site. I know! There are some benefits to social media. I am grateful it provides me a way to keep in touch with my friends overseas - I can see pictures of them and their families, I can communicate rather quickly with them, I can glimpse into their daily lives. I like all those things for friends out of state or even out of town. BUT. But nothing beats face to face, voice to voice, heart to heart relationship. Nothing. Social Media has convinced us that it compares, is perhaps even equal to. It is not. There's no other way to say it, nothing beats real time.
I'm not the only one who uses social media, sees its downfalls, and hates it. Since MySpace hit the scene (and then got chased away by Facebook) and phones got "smart" people have started to recognize the trappings of social media. I remember a few years ago reading an article in Reader's Digest (which I looked for and can't find but trust me on this one okay?) about a group of friends who decided they were way too attached to screens and not enough to true face time. So they turned off their phones every weekend for an entire day and connected...for real, you know the "old-fashioned" way. They would have brunch together and make eye contact and not even think about what they might be missing on Facebook (although it could have been MySpace back then) and they experienced authentic relationship. And the more they did this the easier it got to stay unattached to their smart phones and social media outlets even when they did choose to have access. What held them back from an authentic social life lost its power as they made a choice to disengage to engage. I've kept that in mind through the years and while I have said I want to practice that I haven't.
At least not until this past weekend. :)
Right?! And you know as well as I do that the scenes depicted in that first video aren't exaggerated. I am pretty sure the majority of us have done one, or more, of those things. I know I have. Much to my shame and compulsion.
Authentic social life has been hijacked for the sake of technology and advancements. It makes me sad. Yes, I participate in it - probably too much - and even as I do I hate it. I hate that my connections have diminished to the point of a thumbs up and that I can fake a good mood and nobody is the wiser. I hate that I can be a totally different person through social media and people like me for a false representation of who I am. (Btw, I am probably 99% authentic on my social media sites, my theory is if I can't be the same person on social media as I am in person then I need to reevaluate myself. Ask people who have known me long before social media made an appearance - heck before computers were even around! - and I hope they would say that I am the same on social media as in person.) I hate that smart phones have actually dumbed us down - we no longer have to think for ourselves and try to find answers out on our own, that's what Google is for. I hate that kids these days don't know how to spell properly, they don't know how to write in full sentences, they don't use etiquette while on the phone, they can barely hand write anything, any teacher right now could add to this particular list I've got going on. I hate that people have become uncomfortable with silence and with themselves, that they feel they need to distract themselves all of the time lest they are forced to be introspective or engage with others. I hate that eye contact has become extinct and people are more comfortable looking at their screens than in the eyes of someone. I hate that people have used social media as their newest platform to be rude, passive aggressive, pompous. I hate that people somehow think it is okay to tear other people's beliefs, ideas, and thoughts to shreds and use social media as their excuse for poor behavior. There's more that I dislike but I think you get the idea.
I know. The lady doth protest too much while posting this newest blog on her social media site. I know! There are some benefits to social media. I am grateful it provides me a way to keep in touch with my friends overseas - I can see pictures of them and their families, I can communicate rather quickly with them, I can glimpse into their daily lives. I like all those things for friends out of state or even out of town. BUT. But nothing beats face to face, voice to voice, heart to heart relationship. Nothing. Social Media has convinced us that it compares, is perhaps even equal to. It is not. There's no other way to say it, nothing beats real time.
I'm not the only one who uses social media, sees its downfalls, and hates it. Since MySpace hit the scene (and then got chased away by Facebook) and phones got "smart" people have started to recognize the trappings of social media. I remember a few years ago reading an article in Reader's Digest (which I looked for and can't find but trust me on this one okay?) about a group of friends who decided they were way too attached to screens and not enough to true face time. So they turned off their phones every weekend for an entire day and connected...for real, you know the "old-fashioned" way. They would have brunch together and make eye contact and not even think about what they might be missing on Facebook (although it could have been MySpace back then) and they experienced authentic relationship. And the more they did this the easier it got to stay unattached to their smart phones and social media outlets even when they did choose to have access. What held them back from an authentic social life lost its power as they made a choice to disengage to engage. I've kept that in mind through the years and while I have said I want to practice that I haven't.
At least not until this past weekend. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)