Facebook for Dummy Parents

With the oldest redheaded wonder officially entering the teen years Lanny and I have entered a whole new season of parenthood.  And with the technology of today, part of that season happens to be Facebook.  Of course, Lanny is the smart one out of us and refuses to get on Facebook.  Me?  I'm more optimistic that I will be one of those parents that can bridge the gap between embarrassing parent and cool parent.  Um.  Yeah.  I guess not.  At least this is according to the oldest redhead. 

On April 12 we sat down together and I helped her set up her account (yes, all privacy settings are as high as I can get them on FB, no worries people!) and I wrote a message on her wall welcoming her.  That seemed to be okay so I wrote another one later on.  Apparently THAT was pushing it.  The next morning I thought she might want some pics of her and her art on her page so I went through and tagged a bunch of pics I have of her.  QUIT LAUGHING.  She didn't say don't do it so how was I to know?  Her text to me later that afternoon went something like this:
Oldest Redheaded Wonder:  O Mom u did not
Me:  Did not what?
Oldest Redhead: Wat did u do?
Me:  What are you talking about?  I haven't done anything!
Oldest Redhead:  There r pics of me on fb
Me:  Oh yeah, I thought you'd want some of you for profile pics and stuff.
Oldest Redhead: Dont evr do it again. U need to ask me first
Me:  Um, what?  Are you saying that I the mom have to ask you the daughter for permission to post pics of you on FB? 
Oldest Redhead: Yep

I was perplexed.  They were cute pics of her.  So about this time a teen boy comes in to work (who I am also friends with on FB btw) and I ask him if its so bad that I tagged pics of her.  He just laughed.  I asked if he was friends with his parents on FB, his answer was yes.  I then asked well do they post pics of you and he gave me the strangest look and said nope.  Huh.  Seems my learning curve on this one has just begun. 

So here it is.  For all you parents out there about to enter the teen waters and the world of Facebook with your teens...

Facebook Tips for Dummy Parents:

1. Don't tag your newly teenaged child in any of the pics you have on your page of them.  Apparently this is a huge no-no. 
2. Don't refer to your child at all in any status update because someone might accidently see it and smirk in their direction.  This will label you as the "embarrassing parent". 
3. If you feel the urge to write on their wall then limit it to something like, "Wat up?" Do NOT, and I repeat NOT, write on their wall how awesome they are or how much you love them or heaven forbid how handsome/cute they are.  This is possible grounds for de-friending by your own flesh and blood. 
4. By using proper grammer you will be made fun of by your child who writes in some sort of code that doesn't include vowels for the most part.  Be prepared for the mockery. 
5. Don't ever expect your child to write on your wall or even visit your page.  You may have given birth to them but in the world of FB you are equals and you are, GASP, old! 

After that day in which I was reprimanded by my child for basically thinking that she was cool I have thought the best approach to co-habitating on Facebook peacefully is to just leave her be.  Oh sure, I skim by her page every so often but you'll not see my mark anywhere on there.  I leave the hugs and kisses and affirmations for public, like when she's getting out the car in the mornings and all her school buddies are standing right there. 

Oh.  That's not acceptable either?!?