Spouse? I do not think spouse means what you think it means.

I was on Pinterest the other day and saw the below list. My attention was caught so I started reading through the list. I've been married for almost 23 years and getting a few new-to-me ideas is never a bad idea. But by the time I got to number 5 my attention was caught for a different reason. I didn't want to overreact so I finished skimming the list before I allowed what caught my attention to bloom into a full "What in the world?" 

Do yourself a favor, skim the list yourself and then meet me below. I'd love to know if you noticed the same thing I did. 

The title of the list uses the word "spouse." I looked it up to make sure I was clear on the definition of the word "spouse." For the record I was right - it means husband or wife. 

Okay so now that I know the definition of spouse is husband or wife, and you do too, read that list again. 

Do you see what I see? 

One pronoun is prominent and one is not to be found. So is the list for spouses or is the list actually for wives about husbands? 

Why is this spouses list for wives only? Why is the only pronoun used male when a spouse is male or female? 

Historically women are more consistent in saying "I love you" in numerous and creative ways so this list rubs me the wrong way. In fact, this list is an enabler of the idea out there in culture that women are responsible for relationships. 

Then I saw this and about lost my shiz...

Does USPS know that women are out there - deployed - and perhaps their male significant other should send them a care package? The ad literally says "wives" and totally disregards the fact that many wives are deployed while the husbands are at home with the children.

Now this one gets what spouse means, note the use of both pronouns - her and him. I'd also like to point out the ones that don't use a pronoun which means either him or her can do it! 

74 Simple Things You Can Do to Brighten Your Spouse’s Day

This is the year 2018 - are "we" still so ignorant about what spouse actually means? And are "we" still so blind to the equality a relationship requires - each person contributing to the health and well-being of the partnership. Yes, partnership. And yes, each person in the relationship flirting, washing the other's car, sending a care package across the ocean, driving for the other when they are tired, letting them choose the TV show to watch/restaurant to eat at/candle scent to light, etc. C'mon. We can do better than spouse meaning him. We can do better and we need to do better.