The deception of a perfect world

In my perfect world I...

am a size 6/8

am SUPER wife

am SUPER mom

need no sleep

live in a spotless house

am right with every decision I make

am the best friend anyone ever had

excel at everything I put my hand to

say all the right things at all the right moments

am the first SUPER human ever.

In my real world I...

am a size...what are you crazy?!?! A woman never gives away her weight/size!

am an average wife

am an okay mom

need more and more sleep the older I get

live in a house that is "lived in"

make wrong decisions at least once a day

am not the best friend anyone has ever had

fail more than I excel

open mouth and insert foot more often than not

just blend in with the rest of the human race.

Everyone has their perfect world. But I don't know anyone who lives it.

I am confronted with letting go of my perfect world in order to embrace God's world. I encounter God's world everyday and it clashes with mine and then the gauntlet is thrown down. His or mine? Choosing his always means dying to my definition of "priority".

I've experienced the freedom of picking up the gauntlet and accepting the challenge of dying to myself so why do I still fight it? Why am I faced with it the minute my eyes open to a new day to the minute I close my eyes to rest? Because my perfect world priorities are all about me and not about him at all. My priorities are skewed and don't serve anyone but myself. On the surface they may appear to serve others but really...it is all about me.

But when I choose God's priorities I am taking a stand. I am making a statement. I am choosing surrender. Choosing God's world over mine makes me think of Isaiah 40:29-31, "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." My world really produces weariness because it is never ending, there is always something I could be doing. God's world gives me strength because it relieves me of false responsibilites ~ things I think I should do but really don't need to or shouldn't because they are meant for someone else to do. When I choose to let go of my world I suddenly cease flapping my wings and glide with the wings of God. Immediate freedom.

Choosing God's world means I am saying that the God of the work I do is more important than doing the work of God (wish I could take credit for THAT profound thought but alas the credit belongs to Dr. Carolyn Tennent!). It means that I must allow the busyness of my world to die so that the life of his world can be birthed in me (1 Corinthians 15:36, "What you sow does not come to life unless it dies.").

"Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it." (Matthew 16:24-25 NIV) YEP. Here's the gauntlet once again.